Mature to be indifferent

In my teenage and early 20s, I cared a lot on other people to judge how I was doing well. It made me frustrated as well as excited, but retrospectively, it was a totally unproductive practice. But also retrospectively, I understand old myself as we did have a lot in common to share in that age in terms of life courses and choices indeed. We all lived in the same environment and walked the same road.

Nowadays, I am getting more and more indifferent (or apathetic badly speaking) on other people's business. Life has taught lessons (mostly in hard ways) that someone's life is short and intense to care even oneself. Also, our life choices have departed our courses fairly far away each other, unique to each one's own fate.

Maybe this is feeling of being an adult. It's very much mixed feeling. I am being my own, so feel more complete and solid. But, I feel more lonely in treading my ways ahead. No agony to watch others success in front of my failure. No exhilaration to experience my triumph over others collapse. I am recently living mundane life of just saying congratulations to others success of any kind, and saying oh... poor boy for others misfortunes. Satisfaction and frustration in my own outcomes are just short-lived self-consumptions, not anymore shared with others except family.
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All old-days jealousy and schadenfreude were such a vivid feeling of being alive - which I now see as immature but unique luxury for younger ourselves. Aging and maturation make people less vivid but more stable - like boring but sturdy gray rocky mountains. I start to understand the commencement song in western countries which starts "Gaudeamus igitur, Iuvenes dum sumus" or in English "Let us rejoice, while we are young." It is sad fact to face that I will better understand this in the future.